Spronato dalle parole di Tim Mackinnon nel suo speech all'Agile Day mi sono sforzato di capire la differenza tra esprimere un sano apprezzamento nei confronti di un collega invece che dare la propria approvazione.
Ho scovato questo articolo che mi ha chiarito la differenza : The Difference Between Approval and Appreciation - x passare dalla teoria alla pratica serve l'esercitazione
Riporto le frasi che mi hanno colpito :
Appreciation ... It comes from the heart and is offered spontaneously as the heart wells up with feelings of delight, awe, joy, or love regarding another's way of being. Appreciation has much more to do with the essence of a person rather than with performance. We are appreciating a person's core Self, who they really are and the results of who they are, rather than what they do and their performance.
Appreciation is a true gift.
With appreciation, there is no attachment to the outcome, no expectation that the other should or will continue to perform.
Approval is manipulative - that is, we give it with an outcome in mind. We hope that the other person will continue to do what we want as a result of the approval.
When you share something about yourself with the intent of getting approval, attention or appreciation, it doesn't feel like sharing to other people. Instead they feel pulled at to validate you.
It is tiring to always be trying to get from others what we need to be giving to ourselves.
Trovo che questo argomento fa buona coppia col post precedente sul dare giudizi ed esprimere valutazioni.
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